There are jobs, and there are callings. I’ve had every combination along that continuum in my almost 30 years working. As Michael Bluth says, “A job…you know, it’s something you go to and they pay you. Never mind, I don’t want to ruin the surprise.”

Some jobs pay well but steal part of your soul. Yet you stay because you need the paycheck. Others hardly pay and are a huge time-suck. But you tolerate it for a period of time because it’s fun, and so are your coworkers. Then there are jobs you’d probably still do for free, since just doing whatever it is makes you feel more whole.

After talking with a parent today, I’m reminded yet again why I coach, which I needed more than I realized. This pre-season in particular has been full of challenges and frustrations. The majority of our team didn’t shown up to optional summer practices, despite the coaches being there 3 days a week. We’ve also recently realized most of our players currently make up the middle two-thirds of the lineup. Which may be directly correlated to how often they came to practice.

Do I love tennis? Of course I do. It’s been a major part of my life since I was 11 and learned how to hold a racquet at summer camp. I played on my high school and college teams, and have belonged to a local club since 2006, hitting the court nearly every week. But that’s not why I coach. And trust me, it’s not the pay. I think I speak for most coaches when I say that, somehow, that part doesn’t matter as much.

I coach because it means something. Because one of our girls had a Bad Day yesterday and really needed a hug and some extra encouragement. Her boyfriend moved to Mississippi, and she came to practice after taking him to the airport. I reminded her it will get easier and that she is just as strong as she is sad. She held it together and played two challenge matches in the 85 degree heat, despite probably wanting to be anywhere but there.

I do this for the player who loves tennis so much she cries after the last match every season because she can’t stand that it’s over. That same girl was allowed a 3-minute phone call from basic training, and the first thing she asked her mom was whether she could still play tennis this year.

I coach for the girls in other sports with coaches who yell, or who, worse yet, don’t notice them at all. I am here for the players who try, and the ones who hardly ever come to practice. The ones who get mad when they miss a shot, the ones who never give up, and the ones who rarely break a sweat. We teach, listen to, support, and challenge them. And we spend a good amount of time laughing with them.

I show up every day because it matters–they matter. And I want my team to carry this experience, and hopefully a love of tennis, with them into their adult lives. They should never doubt that no matter what else is going on in their lives, they belong somewhere. They belong here.

Coaching young people isn’t something to take lightly; it’s not only a privilege, but a responsibility. I do this not because it’s something to do, but because it’s something I honestly can’t imagine NOT doing. That’s the difference between a job and a calling.