mountains and fog in montana

guided meditation

*Going back through these posts almost two years later, I realized the date 5-19 was my grandpa’s birthday. He died in late 2009, but I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I was somehow given the gift of this experience, and the peace it brought to me, on his birthday.

I was walking down steps to a beach. There I climbed into a hot air balloon, which took me up up up into the clouds, toward a crystal city. Once we landed on the beach by the palace, I turned to my right and first entered the woods, where I saw my animal guide, a small squirrel. I then proceeded toward a clearing, where there was a grotto of clear blue water. I changed into a pink bathing suit, and swam in the water that was as warm as a bath. I let it wash away all the doubt, fear and insecurity. I felt it cleanse me. I let it soothe my mind and heart. I stayed in the water for a long time, and let it cover me like a warm comforting blanket.

When I got out, I found a white robe waiting for me, so I put it on. I turned to my right and saw my guide walking toward me out of a path leading into the woods. He was wearing sandals, shorts and muted colors. He had glasses and sandy, somewhat shaggy but kempt hair, and a friendly quiet face. He came up to me and took my hand, asking what he could help me with. I told him I want to learn how to love without fear. I stood with him for a few minutes, asking him how to love fearlessly. Asking him to show me the way. He stayed until it was time to leave, hugged me, and then turned and went back into the trees.

I exited the woods, past my animal guide, and climbed the steps into the crystal city. I walked under an arch, over a cobble stone street. To my left was a small chapel. To my right was a large stone building with pillars and smooth white steps. I climbed the steps, went inside and found it to be a big old library with an opening in the center, where light was coming down through the ceiling. People were standing in line there, waiting to make a wish as the light entered their bodies. I got into line, thinking about what I would wish for, knowing in my heart it would come true. When it was my turn, I entered the circle of light… and I asked for God to bring me a soulmate. I allowed the light to flow into my body, letting it warm me with assurance and love.

When I left the circle, I turned to exit the building and an angel was waiting for me. She gave me a gift. I opened my palm, and saw a small rustic cross on a broken rope chain. I closed my palm around it, and walked back out the door, down the wide steps and into the sunlight. I crossed the piazza and entered the small chapel. There were four rows of pews on each side, and thousands of flickering candles lit at the altar. I went up to the altar and lit as many candles as I could, one for each of the people I love. When I was finished, I sat down in a pew. I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned slowly to look at the hand, and saw it was slender, strong and brown from the sun. It belonged to my good friend. I was happy to see him; I’ve missed him. And I sat, watching him as he talked with ease, listening to him but knowing I only had a few minutes. I asked him then what he was to me, and he replied, “I’m your guide…” He stood, hugged me goodbye and said he would see me again soon.

I left the chapel, walked slowly from the crystal city, and climbed back into my balloon. When I landed again on the beach, I sat for a while in a chair in the surf, letting it wash up over my feet. I reflected on the people I had encountered. I reflected on the light in my son’s eyes, and the love in my mother’s heart. I remembered the love that I feel every day, the lives I touch, the people who touch mine. I sat and felt blessed, remembering the many gifts I have been given. I slowly stood up, turned back to the steps and left the beach…slowly at first, then with more purpose, feeling full of light, hope and energy. I was entering back into the waking world full of peace, love, and light. I felt more prepared than I had been before. I was more aware of the gifts that were already inside me, waiting to be remembered.

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